Everyone should have one of these....

and that would be a Gilbert Blythe.

Why?

Because it's having someone...

who is your best friend.

who gives you a little competition.

who inspires you to be your best.

who might make fun of you a little.

who gives you a little wink.

who jokes with you.

who puts up with your romantic ideas.

who lets you think you are winning.

who is real.

Who could say no to that?

I'm Just Getting More Awesome

A quote my roommate showed me says the following, "Everyone I know is getting married or pregnant. I'm just getting more awesome".

Everyone I know is getting married or pregnant

We both laughed at it and some of you even liked it when I posted it to my facebook. It seems like every week that sentence becomes more true. Really. It's an explosion of sparkly rings and albums of monthly pregnancy progression. I love it. I really do but I guess it's a little difficult to understand sometimes why that isn't my life. That's what I thought it would be, you know, married by twenty-one to my prince charming and by now there would be a kid or two in a little house with a picket fence and I would make fresh baked pies every other day. Okay, well maybe not the pies part but you get the picture. So maybe that dream didn't make the time limit but all the other parts are still possible... someday. It's just what to do while you're waiting for that dream to come true.

I'm just getting more awesome

The clear solution is to get more awesome but sometimes we get stuck waiting. The way I see it, we can let life happen to us or we can make life happen. I tend to let it happen to me but therein lies the mistake. Awesomeness will only come by making the most out of whatever part of life I'm in. Maybe where I'm at isn't what I thought but making the most of opportunities and impoving myself is how I'll face this stage of life. So in the mean time, I'm going to develop my talents further, finish my education, discover who I am and become the person I want to become. Obviously there are some things I still need to work on and hopefully as I do, I keep "getting more awesome".

... And you can too!

The only thing I would change about the statement would be to add those few words. The great thing about getting more awesome it that it's not limited to just a few. It's possible for everyone! We should always be changing to become better. So whether you're waiting for prince charming to come along or anticipating a new addition to your family or whatever stage of life you find yourself in, you can still become more awesome too. Come to know yourself, the truly awesome person that you are and be happy with that with no matter what is happening in your life. You're potential is limitless and remember... you are awesome.

Dear Self...

Have you ever pondered on some of the things that were a big deal to you when you were younger? It's amazing how somethings just don't matter anymore. On the other hand, other things may have made you into who you are today. Life is so interesting in retrospect. If you got the chance, what would you tell your younger self?

I would say...

Don't hold onto grudges. Life moves on and you'll soon forget about it.
Make as many friends as you can.
Stop worrying about what everyone thinks about you. Worry about what you think about yourself and what Heavenly Father thinks.
It's okay to be innocent.
Play more.
Forgive.
Take advantage of every opportunity.
Keep moving forward.
Life is hard.
There are still good things to come.
You'll never regret doing good deeds.
Don't do stupid things.
You still won't like country music.
Your heart will get broken.
You decide who you want to be.
A good book can still be your friend but real ones are a lot better.
Develop your talents and gain new ones.
Spur of the moment dance parties are fun.
There are so many good memories yet to be made.
Some of your greatest friends will be made in unexpected places.
You are never alone.

Remember the Good Times

I found a journal I kept of my freshman year at college. I had a list of "things that made me smile today..." Life is funny. Here are a few of those moments.

• We found out that the disposal we thought we were using was actually the fan and the disposal is under the sink. 
• It's fall and I saw a leaf fall from a tree
• In my Book of Mormon class we were having a discussion. Someone said something and my teacher said, "Good! Ten points for Slytherin!"
• I saw a lot of leaves fall from a tree!
• I can check out 50 books at the BYU library! :) 
• My sister told the check out lady at the grocery store, "Don't squish my cans!"
• My friend from work, "Boys, you can't live with them.... and apparently you can't receive salvation without them." 
• As I was pushing a cart at work, all of the sudden a container few off. The container did a flip and I totally caught it full of cottage cheese after it flipped without a morsel spilt.
• This morning a bird flew into the glass door in the front of my dorm. As I stood in shock, I saw a feather drift to the ground.
• A friend gave me a gift on my birthday with a note. She asked me if I had read it and I so I opened it up and found a recipe for a tuna casserole. Ha ha!
• That same friend also thought buffalo were extinct... heehee

I laughed at these small but funny moments and recognized I haven't been doing this lately. Isn't life better when we can see the good?

Holding On

That's what we do... and sometimes that isn't a good thing.

Have you ever thought why we hold on to things that don't do us any good?

Like old notebooks. I tell myself that someday I might want to see those things but how many times have I actually done it? Zero. 

What about the past? Sometimes we hold onto things hoping that maybe just maybe it might come back. Oh, I think that we should hold on to good memories and relish in that fact that they happened. However, wishing so hard that it comes back and obsessing over it isn't healthy at all! I've gone over and over this. I finally realized that personally, I wasn't having hope. Hope for things to come and promises to be kept. That's what keeps us moving forward instead of getting stuck in the rut of life, never moving forward.

I ran across this scripture in my study that reminded me that no matter what has happened, there is something to look forward to. 

But, behold, the righteous, the saints of the Holy One of Israel, they who have believed in the Holy One of Israel, they who have endured the crosses of the world, and despised the shame of it, they shall inherit the kingdom of God, which was prepared for them from the foundation of the world, and their joy shall be full forever.

2 Nephi 9:18

I hope to always see the bright shining future that waits for me if I keep going on through the good and bad.

Sunsets, Stare Downs and Make-up

You may be wondering how all the items above fit together. They don't.

You hear the phrase, "and they rode off into the sunset" like it was supposed to be romantical and dreamy. I drove to the store the other day- right into the sunset and the only thing it was... was blinding. Running away with someone into the sunset would cause more problems than take away. No one would be able to see anything! However, the phrase "riding away with their backs to the sunset" doesn't quite sound literarily beautiful. Maybe "the sun arose lighting the path before them". That one works, right?

Besides finding phrases unromantic, I've been having a hard time this past week with the whole look down or make eye contact at an awkward distance. Normally I don't have a problem with this but I've noticed that people won't look at me for anything. What is up with people? Is it really so bad to look someone in the eye and say hello? I rarely come across someone who will look me in the eyes and say a passing hello.

I understand though, especially deciding if you will say something, when to do it. It's awkward approaching someone in passing. Sometimes even I go to the other side of the street in an attempt to avoid the situation. Do you look away until you are within a few feet? Or wait til they already passed? How about when you awkwardly make eye contact from a distance but it's too far away to say anything. Then you have to look away and then say something when you get close enough. Social dilemmas.

Knowing when and why to do things causes stress. Sometimes it's just nice to not have to worry. That's why I've come to love bedtime. I rub off my make-up and see just myself. Of all parts of the day, it's the time when I like myself the best. I see just myself staring back at me. No masks and problems about sunsets or stare downs. I'm me and that's enough for the moment.

Answers

God has an interesting way of of answering our prayers. I know that patience plays a big part of it and I know that things turn out if we are following the path of righteousness.


Example


I went to bed one night distressed about my circumstances and how things weren't turning out the way I wanted them to. I woke up the next morning to feel a cool breeze and so I looked out the window and  saw a rainbow in the sky. There is no way for me to describe how I KNEW that God loved me in that moment and that I KNEW that he existed and wanted me to be happy. I couldn't deny the evidence. The feeling that He knew that putting those colors in the sky would make me remember all those things was so clear to me.


And Patience


I was reminded of those feelings that I had when I already got an answer to my prayers. Does that even make sense? I was waiting for an answer that I already got. I just needed to recognize it and move forward. 


For a lack of better words, I know that Heavenly Father has got our back. He is there for us and we need to go forward with faith and optimism-even when it seems like we can't find an answer.