Tears

I went to the temple the other day to walk around and talk. As I was talking to my friend, she stopped suddenly and asked me if I had been crying earlier. I felt a little shocked that she had known and it must have shown on my face because she then told me how I had a barely visible tear streak on my cheek. 

That's going to change how I make sure no one knows what I've been up to! But then again, I wonder why we want to hide that we hurt. Aren't we supposed to "mourn with those that mourn"? That's a little hard to do if no one shares how they really feel. 

It's a part of life to feel. The sons of Mosiah had "many afflictions" and did "suffer much both in body and in mind... And also much labor in the spirit". They also felt joy and comfort and I'm sure sharing with their brethren helped ease the burden. 

I don't like to think I'm a bother to people and make them worry but I think they need to help me just as much as I need their help and consoling words. 

While the tears I shed were because of sad mormon messages, this experience has made me reflect on the purpose of being where I am right now and on what life is all about. There are those I can help and others who can help me. I'm here at this place with certain people for a reason. How can I complain about having a mission to accomplish before I get a new assignment?  

The game plan for our lives is a lot more than what we can see. Maybe we can't see right now but eventually there may be some insight. Until then let's see what we can do right here and now. 

There is work to do.

House Guest

Flashback to a few months ago...

Russell came to visit us. I don't know him but he walked into my apartment anyways. In fact, no one in my apartment knew who he was. Maybe I should go back and explain.

My roommates were participating in a dinner group one particular evening. On this night, people were coming and going and I had no idea who they were. I didn't feel too bad because it was still close to the beginning of the semester and it was still okay to ask everyone what their names were. As I sat on a couch in the front room with a friend, we would occasionally see someone poke their head in the open door and walk to the kitchen. It almost seemed normal after the first few times so I didn't think twice when Russell peered in the apartment and sat down on the other couch.

I thought that was a funny place to sit  because the food was in the kitchen but deciding to be friendly, I asked him what his name and decided to make some chit-chat. He seemed nice enough but after a minute we asked if he was there for the dinner group. We were nice and all but didn't he want food? His face went a little pale when he asked if we were there for a business meeting. We shook our heads no and he then excused himself to make a phone call. 

He never returned.

And that's why I get nervous to visit a house I've never been to before. You never know what you're going to get but you can decide to smile and laugh at yourself if you accidentally walk into someone's house you don't know and sit on their couch and make conversation.